2000

MAP
GROWING A CONSCIOUS INVOLVEMENT

Dear Machaelle,

Thank you for the wonderful workshop on MAP last Saturday. I admire your ability for maintaining clarity and conscious presence for such an extended period with such an intense topic. Your dedication to, genuine caring about and integrity with the MAP process was clearly evident, and it touched me very deeply. You have such a wonderful way of making such an extraordinary process so accessible. I very much appreciated your continual reminder that it is designed to be simple so that it is readily accessible. I felt so much joy and excitement when leaving the workshop, along with regret that it was over. I was amazed that the time passed so quickly; I would never have been able to sit so long for one of my academic classes or professional conferences. Thank you for your willingness to invest your time and yourself in making this workshop available.

I also appreciate your willingness to open to nature and all that this path has meant for you over the past twenty or more years. You are a gutsy lady! I read your book Behaving as if the God in All Life Mattered somewhere around the mid-1980s — though I can't remember where and how I came upon it. I came upon it somewhere around the time I was beginning my doctoral work in Miami, Florida, and experiencing one of my life transitions. As a nurse I had been more and more drawn to healing processes that went beyond the bounds of bioscientific medicine, knowing that the many levels of body, mind, spirit and emotions all had to be included in the process. I had no problems with knowing that the experiences you described with nature were real. I wished I could have similar experiences, but I put that thought on a shelf figuring I'd have to be more "evolved" to have anything like this in my life. But I shared your book and experiences with others whenever I could, because I truly believed that at some level we are all capable of the same level of awareness of our co-creation (as you so aptly describe) with nature. I am just so grateful that you have been willing to write and share about your mundane/ fantastic life!

I was introduced to MAP about nine years ago through my friend Beth, who attended your workshop where you introduced the process. After reading her copy of the first edition of the MAP book, I had my scanning session and got my team code, and started having sessions — not really sure what to expect. I rarely "felt" anything and often would fall asleep. Although I would trust that something was going on, I'm not sure I really ever had a sense that much had changed, even a significant change in symptoms or problems I had brought to the session. I was not using MAP consistently and often would think of it only when I was really physically sick. I find it really interesting that, as someone who believes in and teaches holistic approaches to health care, for so long I did not appreciate that taking other than physical concerns to MAP sessions was appropriate!

I called on my MAP team only intermittently for several years. One thing I realize now is that I approached MAP as a forum where I would bring a general concern like "I have a cold" or "my right knee hurts after I did ____ to it" and turn it over to the team to "make better!" I figured that they knew better than I what I needed and that I should be quiet. Needless to say, my developing good communication with my team has been somewhat stunted! In the midst of all of this I have always sensed their presence and patience, welcoming me even when I was hesitant about asking for a session. At times I would feel a strong sense of loving care that I found it very hard to believe was really meant for me.

About a year ago, my friend Beth shared your book Dancing with me, and reading that just seemed to catapult me into a whole new awareness and space of readiness — to risk embracing that which I feel I've known but have been hesitant to follow. None of the experiences you described feel in any way unreal to me. (Perhaps they would if I were being faced with the decision about opening to them!) It just made me marvel at the possibilities that are ours as we share this human earth journey. How wonderful that you are willing to keep being open to this and sharing the possibilities and potentials that are available to us, knowing that this has not been an easy path for you. Reading Dancing has been part of another transition for me. I started using flower essences more regularly (hadn't used them for a number of years either). I'd been on the fence for a couple of years about leaving my academic position (university nursing faculty for 20 years), which had become very energy draining (though it was a "secure" tenured position). I decided to resign this year so I can pursue more writing and healing work — whatever unfolds. In this again I feel the wonderful gift of MAP and your workshop.

After reading the second edition of MAP, I started becoming more consciously involved with the process — though I still brought mostly physical concerns, and I felt the team did have some kind of "sleep button" because I frequently found that as soon as I connected with them in the coning I would start to fade! What I didn't appreciate fully until the workshop was the importance of communication — of detailed description and feedback to them about what is happening during and between sessions. When I asked my team to accompany me to another healing process a couple of weeks before the workshop, that practitioner (she is familiar with MAP and she knew they were there) commented that she felt how excited and anxious my team was to work with me. That felt like such an awakening to me — to have such a felt awareness that they actually wanted to work with me and that I wasn't being a bother!

Being at the workshop only affirmed this for me. When you spoke of your team and what they mean to you, I felt the depth of sincere love and mutual caring you were describing, realizing that I have had glimpses of that, and that I can develop that more with my team. While in the workshop I started feeling an excited anticipation, looking for the next opportunity to have a MAP session! When I did have a session the next morning, I felt such a deep sense of homecoming, that I experience even as I write this, and it still feels as awesome. I let them know that I am committed to learning to communicate effectively and to being an active partner in the process. Ultimately as I develop skills in this area, I'd like to work with a professional MAP team. In some ways, all of this feels like I'm embarking on another graduate program, since I feel it requires at least that much commitment. But what a wonderful, exciting adventure! When I start with the professional team, I feel sure I'll be calling your question line.

One of my challenges is having a life partner who is a wonderfully intuitive, but very allopathic family practice physician. He is open to some of the healing approaches that I am working to include more in my practice, but finds others rather much of a stretch. I have just started talking some about MAP and my use of flower essences to him, even though I have other friends with whom I readily share this. As I become more comfortable and conscious with MAP, perhaps I'll find it easier to share with him too.

What was to be a simple thank you has turned into somewhat of a tome! I am grateful for you, your life and its many adventures, and the many ways you make your experiences available to others. My thanks also to all of your teachers/partners in nature and the White Brotherhood.

Blessings for you all,
P.B., West Virginia